the messages we send...

I will be writing this as if it were yesterday because I wrote it yesterday just never got the chance to type it.. ok just making sure that's clear. So, today I was walking downtown to lunch with a couple good friends of mine. We were just talking and laughing, and in a joking manner I brought up the subject of stupidity. I suggested making a scarlet letter style "s" to slap on the forehead of stupid people. I was reflecting on someone in my literature class categorizing George Washington with the Civil War. No, George Washington wasn't President during the Civil War, NOT even close.. how about the American Revolution! I laughed out loud because this was either a moment of obliviousness or just flat out idiocy. Then in the afternoon I was in Pysch class listening to the Professor ramble on about developmental stages. Today we discussed emotional and social development, an area I'm actually very interested in. I even believe it to be the up most important stage in development. Hear me out, if you are malnourished there is still hope and possibility to recover with ample food and rest, you can still grow and development healthy. (physical development) If you are deprived educational resources and intellectual skills you can still live in a functional manner. It may not be easy but life can still be fulfilling. (Cognitive development). However, WORDS and the lack of emotional support can DAMAGE a person for Good. Emotional development affects social development and together those can make or break a person. In the early years the messages sent to children can form their life long self image and worth. Therefore we should be sensitive to all developmental disabilities indeed. We need to realize that yes developmental stages occur in our younger years, but the HEART and the brain endorphins that control self image and perspective are ALWAYS delicate. Therefore, we even as grownups need to be careful with our words and actions, and realize that the messages we send to others do affect them deeply.
I AM very blessed to have parents like I do who were aware of all my developmental stages, sensitive to the person "they" were molding. Of course they fed me well, offered numerous educational tools, adamant about providing me the appropriate opportunities and tools to enhance my cognitive development and desire to learn and do my best. But MOST importantly they offered sincere love, and support, encouragement, and discipline. They allowed me autonomy while teaching me respect and dignity. They allowed me the chance to initiate my own interactions with others but with boundaries and guidance. In other words my parents expected/ expect the best out of me and they do get discouraged when we don't succeed. They let me know that they expected better without labels of negative messages, such as " you deserve an "S" for stupid". Granted I'm thinking most of us had parents who did not call us stupid, however, I think A LOT more often then not parents FAIL at expressing love and self worth. It some how or the other is not taught in a proper positive manner that you should respect yourself and love yourself. The point of this is not a pyschology paper or to brag on my parents effective and awesome ability to raise strong, functioning, children but rather to make myself and others aware of our very own messages.
The message we send to preschoolers can immobilize them or mobilize them for a lifetime even as college students and adults. So it is evident the messages we send to everyone does take affect on their livelihood. I am aware that most of you reading this don't have a 3 year old, but I'm sure as I do myself, we know and love someone who has been paralyzed or severely crippled by inadequate caregiving and love during not only the developmental stages, but along the course of their life. And, still to this day scars from messages that have a lasting effect on everything else's potential.
Doesn't this kinda sound like Satan? He feeds off conversations such as the Scarlet " S" in which I pick fun of someone Else's mistake, and others laugh at it. Isn't that Satan? Isn't it like Satan to keep parents and friends from sending positive messages of love to others. Isn't like Satan to deprive someone of their own self worth, and to not offer the appropriate praise, support and encouragement to others. It's just like Satan to take a conversation with friends on the way to Cubbies and use it to potentially damage someone else. We, especially myself, need to be more sensitive to others hearts even in our jokes. Quite often my jokes or sarcasm spurs from pride, and further damages my honest humility. Because one bad joke could ruin not only someones day but their own lasting self esteem. Not to mention it shuts them off from you and from me. Even though I think this mornings rip van winkle discussion made others look and sound really silly, I had NO right to make a joke out of it, especially not at someone else defense. And, really how often do we do that... we do it all the time!
In all honesty, once my guard is down I'm such a softy... filled with humility through God's grace and discipline. I am the kind who just sits and cries over others pain, I do care about what happens to Gods people. And there is no doubt in my mind if I had of walked out of class with the same girl the joke was on, and saw her about to get hit by a bus, I'd do my best to save her. Because that is my call ... that is what God has told me to do... not make clever Satan like jokes. My point with this is to use my/ our hearts to guide us. To be sensitive and empathic without being doormats of course, but with integrity and love send messages that we really mean.
God gave me a strong heart and awesome parents who did their best to raise me in a healthy and positive manner... and now it is my DUTY to take that combination and live it out. I need to guard the hearts of all people and love others in the way I am loved. I need to relay the messages that I have never been denied!!